Trust me, if there's anyone that understands, it's me. When you're self sufficient for so long, having someone trying to help you feels like you're being told you're somehow incapable, or lesser for having someone else help. Makes you just want to prove that you're capable on your own all the more. I've fallen into that trap more than a few times.
[Granted, they were for very different reasons, he was arrogant and prideful, as she was insecure, but the end result was ultimately the same.]
It's not an easy thing to fix, but I'm not expecting it to be magically fixed in a week. We can just break it up into smaller more manageable bits. How about, if something is bothering you, you come find me- all you have to do is say "I'm having a bad day" or "I've got something on my mind". I won't make you talk about it, I won't snoop. We can just spend some time together, and maybe do some activities to help you feel better? That way it's not asking for help, but getting some reassurance that I'm here if you need.
[And gives him a warning about any impending emotional breakdowns, or potentially disastrous plans.]
[ She slowly nods in understanding, though she is concerned about giving him even more burdens than she usually does... then again, does that count as having a bad day or something on her mind? It'd be super easy to fall into a cycle of 'dont want to bother about bad feelings, bad feelings grow worse, don't want to bother about the worseness', so on and so forth.
But they have time. If nothing else, they have time. ]
... I'll do my best, and not listen to the little voices that say otherwise. They're pretty loud, but your voice in my head is wayyy louder and more authoritative.
[Oh that’s… actually adorable and oddly flattering.]
Good. Let my voice tell all those bad voices to shut it, they’re less than a bag of discount potatoes.
[And he wasn’t going to make this only about her learning to be better, he had admitted he needed to as well. Hopefully that would make it easier for her to believe they were in this together.]
And, for my part, I’ll also be working on being more open with my feelings too. We’ll work on it together.
[And done they’d gotten the hard part out of the way…]
Webby, do you remember when I first cursed out house? When the Skeksis were attacking? How I fell ill and was snappish for about a week after?
Well, I was essentially in the very early stages of blotting. You see, magic from my world creates a toxic byproduct when we cast spells. The more you accumulate the more it affects your mind, and begins to warp your thoughts, and the more emotionally unstable you are, the easier it becomes to overblot. When a mage overblots a parasitic creature is born from the blot, it feeds off the mage's negative emotions and magic, and forms a "phantom". If that phantom manages to drain the mage to death they retain their form and are let loose upon the world.
Normally we carry something called a "magestone" that acts like a filter and absorbs the blot in our stead allowing us to cast freely. If our casting outpaces what the magestone allows then we overblot, if we're struggling emotionally the threshold for how much we have to cast before overblotting is lowered. I have no magestone here, and my signature spells is very "heavy", so I accumulated a fair amount in a short time, but I was emotionally sound enough that it didn't progress past that.
[And... for his story. He did just say they were going to be more open, and as much as he hated the topic, he'd be the example he hoped Webby to try and strive for.]
Hold this at the top and don't open it. I managed to collect a small sample when I fell ill, and thought it might find use in a potion, but I've been too wary to actually use it.
When I overblotted back home, it was much like how I said it went in the story. I was unaware my situation had been bothering me to the extent it was, as you know I practice vigorous self care, and I suspect that kept things at bay for a long time... but I had been accumulating blot rapidly before the competition. I became obsessive, but it was a slow change that I didn't notice anything wrong. I did something I would never normally do, and the guilt pushed me past my limit... and I overblotted.
I have no memory of what I did right before or even during, but blot brings out the worst in a person. This is secondhand information that I was told after the fact, but all of my ugliness and despair consumed me, and my addled mind told me the best solution to this was to slay anyone who saw me in such a state. I managed to curse the very air making it toxic and impassable. No help could get in, and no one could go out to escape me and seek help.
I am very lucky both to have survived, and that I didn't kill anyone in the ordeal.
[ Webby stays silent during story time, and when handled the vial, she gives it a thorough inspection while making sure it stays shut. There's much to think about.
A poison that accelerates the worse someone feels... given how stressful life can be here, she's rather amazed he hasn't overblotted here at least once. And again, the guilt creeps in - has she ever made that problem worse as well? How much of this inky stuff did she contribute? ]
... Have you tried wishing for a magestone here? If you don't have the shards, I could try wishing for you. It must be really scary, having to use your magic and risking your life for it...
[ As much as she enjoys learning and using magic, she's not about to get excited about something that's clearly caused Vil so much agony. Even if it does find it hard to believe he could hurt anyone that didn't deserve it! He is her hero, after all. ]
I’ll be honest, when I first arrived it was before my overblot, so I didn’t see anything to worry about. Overblotting is exceedingly rare, so I didn’t think I had to worry about it.
I’ll admit I’m considerably more wary of it now. I have to be, I’m at a higher risk of overblotting now that I’ve overblotted once already. But as long as I’m careful, it shouldn’t push me past the earliest signs of blotting.
[Her offer does make him smile, she’s too sweet, really. But he was of the belief that she could afford to be more selfish. She shouldn’t have to worry about taking care of her designated adult.]
That’s a very sweet offer, Webby, but you should spend your shards on yourself. I plan on being my magic and my magestone engraved grimoire together. Currently I only have access to the one spell, so I’m not too worried.
When I do I’ll take you for a broom ride. How does that sound?
[ Oh, she'll be spending shards on herself, don't you worry...
Cue the next big distraction. ]
THAT SOUNDS GREAT! And so much fun! I bet you fly as amazingly as you do... everything else! It's so cool how so many people have mastered flying-solo in their worlds! Usually we have to take the Sunchaster and have Launchpad fly and crash us around the world!
[ is there any detail of her world that doesn't instill worry in others? ]
[This may be what causes Vil to have that second overblot.]
Actually, I’ll be the first to admit, but I’m rather average when it comes to flying.
[As much as he loved praise and adoration, he wasn’t going to oversell himself. He didn’t want Webby to put him on some imaginary pedestal that he couldn’t live up to. He’d be the first to admit his shortcomings.]
I didn’t really bother learning to properly use my magic until college, so I’m behind students that have special training or picked it up for sport when they were young.
You pretty much hit the mail on the head. My focus was on my work, and I didn’t see magic as with pursuing. My father isn’t a mage, so I only learned enough so I wouldn’t accidentally set anything on fire, or any similar mishaps.
[Hopefully it would be enough to make her goals seem more attainable. He wasn’t putting himself down of course, but he was never more critical to others than he was on himself. He knew his strengths, he knew his flaws, and each day he worked to improve humans further.]
It wasn’t until I got an invitation to Night Raven College that I seriously considered it. It’s a very prestigious school that only accepts mages with great potential, and I apparently have a very abundant reserve of magic which must have caught their attention- but it’s another thing that makes me susceptible to overblotting. It takes a lot of magic to overblot and form a phantom.
[ Night Raven College... she hopes one day she could go there too! She kind of hoped to see any school someday, really, but NRC was now at the top of the list. ]
Well, as long as I'm here, I'm going to do everything I can to make sure you never overblot again! This will be a blot-free zone!
[Ugh, he loves it when someone is actually on his level. Anyway, he's switching to private before admitting he's more business savvy than he is generous than he's shown himself to be.]
Absolutely agreed.
As you probably know, I've been making clothes for new arrivals, free of charge, since shortly after I arrived here, and also providing discounted repairs on clothes I've made. That has inspired quite a loyal list of clients, however I have no desire to run this as a business. I intend to return to acting, but my workload has been hindering me.
I'd be willing to share both my client list and designs with you for a fair cut, if you are willing continue my previous deal of making new arrival's clothes for free, as I have been. Also, if you find yourself inundated with work, I'll be willing to help as needed.
[ Essek admired the plainspeaking just as much he admired the social dance of the interactions. There came a point after all when one should be able to glide effortlessly from one to another without appearing overly gauche. That was a skill that both of them held in abundance. ]
I do not begrudge Clothilda the business that she has here in Somnius, what I do have issue with is the lack of respect that she gives her clientele; so in the short period of time in which I worked there, I endeavored to provide something that she lacked.
Something that I still endeavor to provide.
I would be more than happy to broker such a deal with you, it would kill two birds with one stone; it would serve to remind those new that there are options, but also it would forge a partnership between the two of us, if you will. There is nothing more valuable than contacts.
We could draft up something together, both for our personal reference? I find that I work best such-- if that is alright with you, of course. [ Essek was well-familiar with contracts, and usually chose to work within contracts. The only thing that he was not too keen on putting a contract to was his marriage to Caleb. ]
I agree with you on all counts. Her clothes are better fit for a gala or runway, but they're impractical for everyday wear. Delves too deep in the creative aspect, not enough in the business aspect.
If you weren't going to suggest a contract, I would. It seems like we're on the same page. A collaboration would be a wonderful way to seal the deal as well. I can only see this as being a net positive for us both.
I'll admit, I haven't had the chance to get too fancy and fun with most of what I make, due to the speed in which I have to make them. It'll be nice to get to have a little creative breathing room for a change.
[Actually... that gives him an idea...]
I don't supposed you celebrate Halloween where you're from?
Edited (I had and idea, so he had to have an idea. And then I typoed.) 2024-06-06 01:54 (UTC)
[ There are harvest festivals, he is aware of in the Empire-side of Wildemount; but he is unclear of exactly what Halloween is, so he is going to need some catch-up on it; but costumes would actually be something that Essek would be really interested in. ]
Tell me more, I would be neither a proper wizard nor a businessman if I wasn't open to learning new things.
Vil goes all-out for the holiday it would be perfect
In my world it's a holiday when the barrier between the realm of the living and dead are blurred, so ghosts are able to interact with the living. It has often resulted in quite a manner of mischief, so the holiday started with people either dressing up as ghosts to avoid being a target, or placating the spirits with offerings of candy and sweets. Of course over the years costumes grew more varied and extravagant, embracing all a manner of beast and monster under the guise of being the "ghost of" such beings.
Not every world seems to share the backstory, but I have noticed that costumes, sweets, and lanterns of some sort are a common theme across other worlds.
And what better way would there be to show off our combined skills than a gathering centered around costumes? The nature of the costumes allows for a fair amount of artistic freedom, and it gives people the opportunity to throw away their inhibitions and dress in ways they normally wouldn't.
sorry for the lag, medical emergancy! but back now!
We have nothing like that in the Dynasty-- and our dead-honouring usually involves twelve hours of consecutive chanting and relic worshipping. [ Coincidentally that usually happened on Essek's name day, which gave him a lasting distaste of the holiday in general-- as all pattern-card capricorns did when sharing their birthday with a major holiday. ]
The costumes would be amazing, so too would the decorations; I wonder if the Raven's Quill has any sort of books on the subject, I think it would be excellent to consult all of the various traditions throughout the worlds? Perhaps even call upon some unique ones, to appeal individually to those in attendance-- I could ask my fiancé about his own traditions, I am sure that Blake and Eilowny have some as well.
Do we have a place that would make a good venue for such a gathering?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Trust me, if there's anyone that understands, it's me. When you're self sufficient for so long, having someone trying to help you feels like you're being told you're somehow incapable, or lesser for having someone else help. Makes you just want to prove that you're capable on your own all the more. I've fallen into that trap more than a few times.
[Granted, they were for very different reasons, he was arrogant and prideful, as she was insecure, but the end result was ultimately the same.]
It's not an easy thing to fix, but I'm not expecting it to be magically fixed in a week. We can just break it up into smaller more manageable bits. How about, if something is bothering you, you come find me- all you have to do is say "I'm having a bad day" or "I've got something on my mind". I won't make you talk about it, I won't snoop. We can just spend some time together, and maybe do some activities to help you feel better? That way it's not asking for help, but getting some reassurance that I'm here if you need.
[And gives him a warning about any impending emotional breakdowns, or potentially disastrous plans.]
Does that feel a little more manageable?
no subject
But they have time. If nothing else, they have time. ]
... I'll do my best, and not listen to the little voices that say otherwise. They're pretty loud, but your voice in my head is wayyy louder and more authoritative.
[ This is meant to be a compliment. ]
no subject
Good. Let my voice tell all those bad voices to shut it, they’re less than a bag of discount potatoes.
[And he wasn’t going to make this only about her learning to be better, he had admitted he needed to as well. Hopefully that would make it easier for her to believe they were in this together.]
And, for my part, I’ll also be working on being more open with my feelings too. We’ll work on it together.
[And done they’d gotten the hard part out of the way…]
Now, you want to hear about overblotting?
no subject
YES YES YES I WANT TO HEAR EVERY SINGLE LAST DETAIL! Don't leave anything out! I want everything!
[ Oop. She hesitates, then sits back down, chuckling nervously. ]
... Please.
no subject
Webby, do you remember when I first cursed out house? When the Skeksis were attacking? How I fell ill and was snappish for about a week after?
Well, I was essentially in the very early stages of blotting. You see, magic from my world creates a toxic byproduct when we cast spells. The more you accumulate the more it affects your mind, and begins to warp your thoughts, and the more emotionally unstable you are, the easier it becomes to overblot. When a mage overblots a parasitic creature is born from the blot, it feeds off the mage's negative emotions and magic, and forms a "phantom". If that phantom manages to drain the mage to death they retain their form and are let loose upon the world.
Normally we carry something called a "magestone" that acts like a filter and absorbs the blot in our stead allowing us to cast freely. If our casting outpaces what the magestone allows then we overblot, if we're struggling emotionally the threshold for how much we have to cast before overblotting is lowered. I have no magestone here, and my signature spells is very "heavy", so I accumulated a fair amount in a short time, but I was emotionally sound enough that it didn't progress past that.
[And... for his story. He did just say they were going to be more open, and as much as he hated the topic, he'd be the example he hoped Webby to try and strive for.]
Hold this at the top and don't open it. I managed to collect a small sample when I fell ill, and thought it might find use in a potion, but I've been too wary to actually use it.
When I overblotted back home, it was much like how I said it went in the story. I was unaware my situation had been bothering me to the extent it was, as you know I practice vigorous self care, and I suspect that kept things at bay for a long time... but I had been accumulating blot rapidly before the competition. I became obsessive, but it was a slow change that I didn't notice anything wrong. I did something I would never normally do, and the guilt pushed me past my limit... and I overblotted.
I have no memory of what I did right before or even during, but blot brings out the worst in a person. This is secondhand information that I was told after the fact, but all of my ugliness and despair consumed me, and my addled mind told me the best solution to this was to slay anyone who saw me in such a state. I managed to curse the very air making it toxic and impassable. No help could get in, and no one could go out to escape me and seek help.
I am very lucky both to have survived, and that I didn't kill anyone in the ordeal.
no subject
A poison that accelerates the worse someone feels... given how stressful life can be here, she's rather amazed he hasn't overblotted here at least once. And again, the guilt creeps in - has she ever made that problem worse as well? How much of this inky stuff did she contribute? ]
... Have you tried wishing for a magestone here? If you don't have the shards, I could try wishing for you. It must be really scary, having to use your magic and risking your life for it...
[ As much as she enjoys learning and using magic, she's not about to get excited about something that's clearly caused Vil so much agony. Even if it does find it hard to believe he could hurt anyone that didn't deserve it! He is her hero, after all. ]
no subject
I’ll admit I’m considerably more wary of it now. I have to be, I’m at a higher risk of overblotting now that I’ve overblotted once already. But as long as I’m careful, it shouldn’t push me past the earliest signs of blotting.
[Her offer does make him smile, she’s too sweet, really. But he was of the belief that she could afford to be more selfish. She shouldn’t have to worry about taking care of her designated adult.]
That’s a very sweet offer, Webby, but you should spend your shards on yourself. I plan on being my magic and my magestone engraved grimoire together. Currently I only have access to the one spell, so I’m not too worried.
When I do I’ll take you for a broom ride. How does that sound?
no subject
Cue the next big distraction. ]
THAT SOUNDS GREAT! And so much fun! I bet you fly as amazingly as you do... everything else! It's so cool how so many people have mastered flying-solo in their worlds! Usually we have to take the Sunchaster and have Launchpad fly and crash us around the world!
[ is there any detail of her world that doesn't instill worry in others? ]
no subject
Actually, I’ll be the first to admit, but I’m rather average when it comes to flying.
[As much as he loved praise and adoration, he wasn’t going to oversell himself. He didn’t want Webby to put him on some imaginary pedestal that he couldn’t live up to. He’d be the first to admit his shortcomings.]
I didn’t really bother learning to properly use my magic until college, so I’m behind students that have special training or picked it up for sport when they were young.
no subject
How come you didn't use your magic until then? Was movie-life too busy for it?
no subject
[Hopefully it would be enough to make her goals seem more attainable. He wasn’t putting himself down of course, but he was never more critical to others than he was on himself. He knew his strengths, he knew his flaws, and each day he worked to improve humans further.]
It wasn’t until I got an invitation to Night Raven College that I seriously considered it. It’s a very prestigious school that only accepts mages with great potential, and I apparently have a very abundant reserve of magic which must have caught their attention- but it’s another thing that makes me susceptible to overblotting. It takes a lot of magic to overblot and form a phantom.
no subject
Well, as long as I'm here, I'm going to do everything I can to make sure you never overblot again! This will be a blot-free zone!
[private]
[Ugh, he loves it when someone is actually on his level. Anyway, he's switching to private before admitting he's more business savvy than he is generous than he's shown himself to be.]
Absolutely agreed.
As you probably know, I've been making clothes for new arrivals, free of charge, since shortly after I arrived here, and also providing discounted repairs on clothes I've made. That has inspired quite a loyal list of clients, however I have no desire to run this as a business. I intend to return to acting, but my workload has been hindering me.
I'd be willing to share both my client list and designs with you for a fair cut, if you are willing continue my previous deal of making new arrival's clothes for free, as I have been. Also, if you find yourself inundated with work, I'll be willing to help as needed.
no subject
I do not begrudge Clothilda the business that she has here in Somnius, what I do have issue with is the lack of respect that she gives her clientele; so in the short period of time in which I worked there, I endeavored to provide something that she lacked.
Something that I still endeavor to provide.
I would be more than happy to broker such a deal with you, it would kill two birds with one stone; it would serve to remind those new that there are options, but also it would forge a partnership between the two of us, if you will. There is nothing more valuable than contacts.
We could draft up something together, both for our personal reference? I find that I work best such-- if that is alright with you, of course. [ Essek was well-familiar with contracts, and usually chose to work within contracts. The only thing that he was not too keen on putting a contract to was his marriage to Caleb. ]
no subject
If you weren't going to suggest a contract, I would. It seems like we're on the same page. A collaboration would be a wonderful way to seal the deal as well. I can only see this as being a net positive for us both.
I'll admit, I haven't had the chance to get too fancy and fun with most of what I make, due to the speed in which I have to make them. It'll be nice to get to have a little creative breathing room for a change.
[Actually... that gives him an idea...]
I don't supposed you celebrate Halloween where you're from?
oh goodness, Halloween-- this sounds delicious!
[ There are harvest festivals, he is aware of in the Empire-side of Wildemount; but he is unclear of exactly what Halloween is, so he is going to need some catch-up on it; but costumes would actually be something that Essek would be really interested in. ]
Tell me more, I would be neither a proper wizard nor a businessman if I wasn't open to learning new things.
Vil goes all-out for the holiday it would be perfect
Not every world seems to share the backstory, but I have noticed that costumes, sweets, and lanterns of some sort are a common theme across other worlds.
And what better way would there be to show off our combined skills than a gathering centered around costumes? The nature of the costumes allows for a fair amount of artistic freedom, and it gives people the opportunity to throw away their inhibitions and dress in ways they normally wouldn't.
sorry for the lag, medical emergancy! but back now!
We have nothing like that in the Dynasty-- and our dead-honouring usually involves twelve hours of consecutive chanting and relic worshipping. [ Coincidentally that usually happened on Essek's name day, which gave him a lasting distaste of the holiday in general-- as all pattern-card capricorns did when sharing their birthday with a major holiday. ]
The costumes would be amazing, so too would the decorations; I wonder if the Raven's Quill has any sort of books on the subject, I think it would be excellent to consult all of the various traditions throughout the worlds? Perhaps even call upon some unique ones, to appeal individually to those in attendance-- I could ask my fiancé about his own traditions, I am sure that Blake and Eilowny have some as well.
Do we have a place that would make a good venue for such a gathering?